Translation: Buy candles. Lotsa candles.

Once you plow through the gibberish, biz-pop cliches and endless important-sounding committee-speak, you find that ... absolutely nothing substantive has been said here. Jeezus, such claptrap.

Uh ... $5-$10-$100 per conch? Uh ... yeah. And, you would enforce this ... how?

That’s a good point. I remember a friend on the Out Islands remarking once that if it weren’t for tourists and the expats, “We’d all be back to growin’ tomatoes for a living, and trying to sell them to each other.”

It’s been a long time since the Bahamas was of much strategic importance to the U.S. Mr. Trump has yet to confirm an ambassador, after 3 years, and Mr. Obama’s was an empty-headed political fundraiser who was seldom here.

No prob. We specialize in “creative” budgeting.

Yeah, not just the lawyers ... I sat in an Out Islands court one day and watched the arresting police officer serve as prosecutor and a witness in a criminal case. He literally took the stand, was sworn in, and questioned himself ... and the “defense attorney” did not object! But he did, of course, collect a fat fee — in advance.

At the bottom of a Neil Hartnell story — that’s why nobody saw it. 😎

The only reason Bahamian attorneys double-dip is that they have not yet figured out a way to triple-dip. But I hear that Philip “Gravy” Davis is hard at work on that problem.

Wow. This is one sad, sad story.